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~ ONLY IN AMERICA |
MUST WE SPEND BILLIONS
BECAUSE WE CAN'T LET CHRYSLER GO BANKRUPT, AND THEN, LET CHRYSLER
GO BANKRUPT. |
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ONLY IN AMERICA |
CAN CONGRESS FORCE FANNIE AND FREDDIE
TO BUY SUBPRIME LOANS, AND THEN BLAME FANNIE AND FREDDIE FOR BUYING
SUBPRIME LOANS. |
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ONLY IN AMERICA |
A MAJOR CRISIS REQUIRES
SWIFT ACTION TO PASS A BILL WITHOUT READING IT, THEN VACATION FOR
THREE DAYS BEFORE THE PRESIDENT HAS TIME TO SIGN IT. |
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ONLY IN AMERICA |
YOU CAN BE LEGALLY ILLEGAL. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
THE CONGRESS MAKES
LAWS THAT THEY DON'T HAVE TO FOLLOW. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
WHERE YOUR VICE PRESIDENT DECLARES ‘JOBS’
A 3 LETTER WORD. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
DOES THE MILITARY
GET INVESTIGATED BY HOMELAND SECURITY AS POSSIBLE TERRORISTS, WHILE
OUR BORDERS ARE WIDE OPEN. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
CAN YOU GET A TAX REFUND ON TAXES YOU
DIDN'T PAY · ONLY IN AMERICA, CAN YOU CAN BLAME OTHERS WHEN YOU DON'T
PERFORM. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
YOU HAVE MORE RIGHTS
BEING ILLEGAL, THAN YOU DO LEGAL. |
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ONLY IN AMERICA |
CAN YOU BE 13 AND HAVE AN ABORTION WITHOUT
TELLING YOUR PARENTS, BUT MUST HAVE A WRITTEN NOTE FROM YOUR PARENT
WHY YOU MISSED SCHOOL. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
ARE YOU PUNISHED FOR
GOOD PERFORMANCE AND REVERED FOR NONPERFORMANCE. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
CAN YOU CALL LARGE CORPORATIONS EVIL,
WHILE 99.9% OF THE AMERICANS WORK IN COMPANIES WITH LESS THAN 500
EMPLOYEES. |
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ONLY IN AMERICA |
CAN CHRYSLER GET 10
BILLION IN AID FOR THEIR COMPANY OF 30,000 EMPLOYEES. I GUESS IT IS
DIFFICULT TO RUN A COMPANY FOR $333,333 PER EMPLOYEE. |
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ONLY IN AMERICA |
WE CARE ABOUT 3 GUYS THAT GET WATER
UP THE NOSE, WHILE OUR ENEMIES ARE BEHEADING US AND BLOWING CROWDS
OF PEOPLE UP WITH SUICIDE BOMBINGS. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
YOU CAN SAY OTHER
INTERROGATION TECHNIQUES WORK, BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THOSE TECHNIQUES
ARE. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
YOU CAN BE PRESIDENT WITHOUT A BIRTH
CERTIFICATE |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
DO POLITICIANS CONSIDER
'WE THE PEOPLE' ASTRO-TURF. |
| ~
ONLY IN AMERICA |
WHATEVER GOES WRONG WILL ALWAYS BE BUSH'S
FAULT. |
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LASTLY, HOWEVER |
IN AMERICA, YOU CAN ONLY BE PRESIDENT WHEN THE TELEPROMPTER IS
ON!
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